Wednesday, April 29, 2009


Today while reading the Dear Annie section in the news paper,which is much like Dear Abbey a question and answer article to assist people with personal issues to gain answers to their problems.
Today a lady,who is 50 something is dating a gentleman 20 years her concerned because if they become serious she is not sure how she will tell her children and his parents because of their age difference.She wanted to know if we have a double standard in this country when it comes to younger men with older women compared to older men with younger women.
Now being in a younger woman older man relationship my self,my husband is 12 years older then me,all I can say is my husband and I are best friends and it works for us.
When we were first dating my husband was concerned about our age gap but it seems I was a more mature 25 year old and he was a more younger free spirit 36 year old.
By the time I meet him I had been married,divorced and had a 3 year old child.I had a job,owned a home and had a new car and although I had some debt I was able to pay all my bills and be independent.
He on the other hand had lived a free single life style,went collage and held several jobs and was ready to be with some one and settle down.
For us this worked out well and even though I had relatives who said I was looking for "a father figure" and his friends said "I'm glad you brought your daughter",the friends were kidding the relatives were not,we have endured for over 20 years.
We have grown together and seem to have a good relationship with each other,which many of my friends,who are married to people their own age, can not say.
Being with an older person is nice,its secure and even though sometimes he forgets I'm an adult and capable of making clear headed decisions,its all worth it in the end.
I have several friends who are woman married to younger men and when I meet and spend time with them I understand why their relationships work.We are all free spirits looking for the love of our life.When two people meet and it works its a wonderful thing.
A soul mate is some one who completes and full fills your empty places in your life and there is no age limit on love.
Is there a double standard? I'm sure there is.We have all these social ideas of what an ideal partner is suppose to be.We should all be a certain height or weight,have a certain look ,dress a certain way,be a certain age.But this is not realistic, God made us all in his image and he wants us to be happy with our mates.He said it is not good for man to be alone and made woman to be his companion.He didn't give any other stipulations like height,weight or hair color.He made Eve from Adams rib not from his head bone or foot bone.The rib is near the heart just were God expects us to be with our own partners,near their heart and our own.

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