Friday, January 2, 2009

got a phone call today

Today,when I came home from grocery shopping,my husband told me my ex-brother-in-law Steve had just called, his mother is in the hospital dying and he wanted to talk to me.I must admit I angrily told my husband "and what would that have to do with me?".my husband calmly said you should call him.
I am not on very good terms with my ex husband or his older brother,Steve was married to a woman named Patty,who had ms.and was in a wheel chair and left her for his best friends' wife.Patty was my friend and his leaving devastated not only her but their 15 year old daughter.
He is now remarried and they have a son.
After i got passed my anger I hesitantly decided to call him, his wife answered the phone then had Steve pick up,at first I felt very uncomfortable but asked how things were going with his mother and realized has i talked with him that he was just a man whose mother was dying and needed someone to talk to.
When we were finished i told him it it is always very hard to lose your parent no matter how old you are you always feel like an orphan at that point he told me his father had Alzheimer's disease and could not remember his present wife or child just Patty and her daughter.
I told him that he could call Vic or I any time he needed to talk and that we both loved him at that point he began to weep so hard he could not continue talking to me and tried to ask me to tell my son about his grandmother being so sick,i finished his sentence and reassured him i would.
Its strange how things can change in a minute I went from total anger and disdain to
calling him trying to be kind and ended the conversation with meaning what I said.I try never to hold grudges if I'm angered I just leave but sometimes the baggage is still there and like salt being poured in a wound it still hurts.
life is life and in the end we are all bruised people in need of love.

1 comment:

Laura said...

For the sake of our loved-ones, we have to let go and forgive those who have offended us and are our enemies. It was the case after I divorced my first husband. The kids knew I had forgiven him and tried to help in many ways. But it really hit home when I placed a red rose in his coffin. In the end love was stronger.