While talking with Fr. Peter I explained to him about my inability to do all the religious things I want to do when home.It seems that as we go through Lent I have prayers to say,Psalms to read,meditation,reading of both Old and New Testaments and other religious types of materials and am beginning to feel well,slightly over whelmed.I'm not sure when and where to make all these things fit into my daily routine.
He asked me if I were the type of person who scheduled my time by writing things and times down? The first answer I thought of was "Yes but only the important things".Though that was not the answer I gave I realized that if this was my brains first response then I need to figure out why.
On my drive home I started to think about this answer.Did I really feel that my religious life was not important enough to write down and follow through?
I am not much when it comes to writing things in note pads or wearing watches.When I have a day off you will never see me wearing a watch,I do not want time to be the focus of my day.
Most of the lists I write are for things like groceries.Important dates and times I keep on my kitchen calender.
The fact that I do not schedule religious time,I think,relates to the fact that I like to feel loose with my time and not constrained into feeling like a slave to my schedules and the out side world.In other words I like to run my life on my own time.I believe this is called self absorption.
Today when I got home I decided to try and set up a schedule of religious time.Each day I will try something new and see how it fits into my daily routine,if it works at this particular time of day I will write it down,if not I will try another time.In a matter of days,or weeks I should be able to schedule my time so it fits my home and work times.
I have also decided to keep a kind of log with prayers I like and interesting quotes and passages from the bible and religious books,things that jump out at me.Later I can reread and contemplate them.
On my drive home I saw a sign on a church that said "If God chose only perfect people to do his work then nothing would get done." I like this quote it reminds me that God does not expect us to be perfect but to do the best we can.This will go into my log to remind me when I feel off my path toward God that its OK to try again and readjust.Besides the last perfect person died over 2,000 years ago.