Turkey Shopping

I had today off and decided it was time to get our Christmas Turkey.Now this,to most people,would seem like a simple and easy thing to do,after all I was going grocery shopping anyways and there is still 7 more days til Christmas.
Now I have certain turkey priorities that need to be met in order to pick just the right fowl.
First I wanted something frozen,since I'm working this week end,I don't want my bird sitting in the fridge for one whole week until Christmas day.
Now having a standard rather small freezer full of stuff the decision had to be made if there was room enough in it or if Vic,my husband, needed to go to one of his empty apartments to start a freezer up to hold this bird over til Monday when it would make its visit back to us to start the defrosting process in our refrigerator.
So much needed freezer measurements were taken and it seems it will be staying at our house from start to finish.
Second it must be organic with no processed broth in it only pure and natural will do.Ever since my mother died from colon cancer I buy only organic meat with no hormones or anti biotic.I know,I know but it makes me feel proactive,even if it were to make little or no difference at all to my future cancer prospects.
Third it must be a certain weight.Since we like our turkey done by rotisserie it can be no heavier then 16 pounds in order to turn effectively and not be off balance.
With all this in mind I started my journey in Putnam Ct.at Price Choppers and was overjoyed to find the brand I wanted, but not the size.
So with a heavy heart it was off to Park and Shop in Dudley,Mass.there I found the right size but wrong brand and it wasn't frozen.
At this point I began to think ham might be our Christmas fare but my poor darling, Vic would be greatly disappointed at this change in menu and we can't have that on Christmas day,now can we?
Next to Webster,Mass.I went to end up at Shaw's,which has all sorts of organic things.Maybe,I hoped,my prized poultry would be found.
After searching the store for what seemed much longer then the 10 minutes it really was,low and behold an organic turkey.It was the right weight,the right size,frozen like a rock and all natural. "hip hip hurray another prayer answered!"
As I put my new 14 pound friend into the shopping cart and looked down lovely I began to laugh.Stamped on the front of its wrapper were the words "kosher."
I thought to myself "Does something about a Kosher Turkey being served at Christmas Dinner by an Orthodox family to their Catholic relatives seem appropriate to you?" I'm not so sure this is what the Rabi who pronounced it "Kosher" truly had in mind.
Oh well welcome to America the melting pot or should I say Turkey pan of the world.
....Shalom you all...or.... Merry Christmas...Which ever you prefer...